“We are born and we die…” John Tarrant

An excerpt from the poem

In Blackwater Woods

by Mary Oliver

To live in this world

you must be able
to do three things:
to love what is mortal;
to hold it

against your bones knowing
your own life depends on it;
and, when the time comes to let it go,
to let it go.


Today death came to the husband of a reader of this blog. It came suddenly but not unexpectedly. There is sadness, yet, there is gratitude to see the end of suffering. Furthurmore, we know so little about the end of life. But those who remain grieve and cry and will  live with sadness for awhile. “Awhile,” is different for each of us.

It has been my experience that story telling, about our loved ones who die, is one of the loveliest things we can do for each other. And we don’t need to only tell the great things. It seems to me that there is great humanity, joy, love, laughter and truth in being able to talk about foibles, quirks, eccentricities…the whole gamut of what makes each of us unique. We can even tell stories through memorabilia. What were the things our loved one collected, would waste money on, treasured. Hearing stories through the lens of others can warm and soften our hearts as we all know too well that no one is perfect. (well, maybe my Mother) :-))

There is no way to avoid death, and the longer we live the more often we will face death. This is hard.

I extend words of solace and comfort to all of you who are grieving the loss of a loved one. When the time comes, life will be there to  gently move you forward. Don’t you think we are all life’s helpers…  we are in this together and are here to help and to be helped.

Always know you can reach out if you need a hand. If you like, you are always welcome to write to me and tell me a favourite story of your loved one. I would be honoured to hear it.

Some of you know by now that I love this little poem by Rumi. He speaks words of comfort to me, and I hope he does for you too.

Meaningful Memories JapanThe Window by Rumi

Your body is away from me
but there is a window open
from my heart to yours.

From this window, like the moon
I keep sending news secretly.


Note 1:) Knowing we will not live forever can help us treasure the precious moments we have.

Note 2:) We all have regrets because we are humans not robots. There is no need, however, for our regrets to hold us back.

Note 3:) The banner photo was taken in Hawaii by Gottfried, who has kindly donated a library of photos for my use, and the one of the water and cosmos, I took in Japan, while on a five day walking trip.

Note 4:) I am grateful for your confidence in me. Showing up; reaching out; staying in touch. Thank you. My heart is with you and I extend warmest wishes to each of you. Trudy





10 replies
  1. Emma Rooney
    Emma Rooney says:

    Thanks Trudy for today’s piece.
    I really appreciate the window poem by Rumi. It’s my first time reading it. I will be reciting it when I visit my window and thinking of you. Thank you for sharing!

  2. Karen Cain
    Karen Cain says:

    Thank you, again, Dear Trudy, for the support and caring that your blog brings. I am reading a newly published book, ‘Yes, We All Know, How This, Ends’, by Anna Lyons and Louise Winter. It is a book about life and living as much as it is about death and dying – a manual to sustain and guide us.

    • T Boyle
      T Boyle says:

      Thank you dearest Karen. It does my heart good to know that you find this spot supportive. Sending warmest wishes and love, enroute to NB. Trudy


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