The Shirt Off Her Back

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Shirt off one’s back

This expression “shirt off one’s back” means the ultimate in generosity and originated as best as I can tell in a novel written in 1771 by Tobias Smollett called Humphry Clinker.

I was the recipient of the literal “shirt” two days ago on my Birthday. I opened a surprise gift from my friend in Victoria and to my amazement discovered the exact shirt I had admired when I saw her last month.I was delighted that she had gone to the trouble to track down that same shirt and send it to me for my birthday.

It was only later that I realized this was her shirt. Laundered, ironed and carefully folded. Just like new. As it turned out she could not find the same shirt and in fact she couldn’t find any shirt that she wanted to give me, so she gave me her own. It was her favourite shirt. How I know that was because when I previously complimented her on that shirt, she told me it was her favourite.

So what do you do with such a special gift that money can’t buy? You humbly and graciously say thanks.

Years ago another friend was asked what he would buy if money was no object? His answer surprised us all. “Nothing,” he said. “Anything money could buy that I wanted, I could have.”

“What I want, money can’t buy.”

This was a sobering thought.

I received several gifts on the 13th that money can’t buy:

A new piece of music played by my 11 year old Grandson. He had practiced for three hours over the weekend in order to play Auroroa Borealis, for me, when I arrived in the morning. He told me the practicing was no effort because he knew how happy I would be to hear it. This was followed up by cinnamon and apple crepes made by his own hands.

Beautiful handmade cards with the loveliest of messages.

More delicious food prepared by loving hands

Flowers meticulously arranged from afar and with the help of an on-the-ground person.

Decorations hand drawn and decorated.

The finest of chocolate

Phone calls, zoom calls,  emails and texts. Poems and kindnesses and beautiful cards galore.

We so often count the wrong things and leave out the most important things that can’t be measured by an accountant or statistician. In the end it isn’t our status, wealth or public profile that counts the most. It is the measure of small things that can go unnoticed or taken for granted that really count.

We don’t always believe this because the world is programmed to recognize the bright and shining things that can be bought and sold. They are beautiful and appreciated too. But in the end it is the small things that make the biggest difference.

May all of you have the experience of loving and being loved; of helping and being helped; of understanding and being understood and may you all treasure your birthdays – a privilege denied many.

Remember to sing while there is voice left.

Notes

Note 1:)  My mother learned to swim the year she turned 75 to help with her arthritis. I thought the least I could do to honour her legacy was to go back to swimming to help with mine. So I did. My first time in a pool in about four years and it felt good.

Note 2:) So many people in my family and elsewhere have September birthdays. I send best wishes to all of my September readers. I wonder if it has something to do with New Year’s Eve celebrations.

Note 3:) These early autumn days are fabulous. One prescription and the only prescription I will ever offer is to get out in nature for 20 minutes a day, if you aren’t already doing it. It may change your life.

Note 4:) Thanks again for showing up here. You have my appreciation and gratitude. How lucky am I. Warmest greetings, Trudy

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It Feels Like Hope

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Introductions

– by Susan Glassmeyer

Let’s not say our names
or what we do for a living.
If we are married
and how many times.
Single, gay, or vegan.

Let’s not mention
how far we got in school.
Who we know,
what we’re good at
or no good at, at all.

Let’s not hint at
how much money we have
or how little.
Where we go to church
or that we don’t.
What our Sun Sign is
our Enneagram number
our personality type according to Jung
or whether we’ve ever been
Rolfed, arrested, psychoanalyzed,
or artificially suntanned.

Let’s refrain, too, from stating any ills.
What meds we’re on
including probiotics.
How many surgeries we’ve survived
or our children’s children’s problems.
And, please—
let’s not mention
who we voted for
in the last election.

Let’s do this instead:
Let’s start by telling
just one small thing
that costs us nothing
but our attention.

Something simple
that nourishes
the soul of our bones.
How it was this morning
stooping to pet the sleeping dog’s muzzle
before going off to work.

Or
yesterday,
walking in the woods
spotting that fungus on the stump
of a maple
so astonishingly orange
it glowed like a lamp.

Or just now,
the sound
of your
own breath
rising
or sinking
at the end
of this
sentence.

I found this poem on gratefulness.org

A Special Place

Gabriola Island, on the west coast of Canada is one of my special places, where it is easy to pay attention. I suspect you all know what I mean when I speak  about this. I can imagine that everyone reading this post has a special place. Mine is composed of beauty, ritual and history, people, forest trails, sandstone beaches, sunrises and sunsets, wild roses, arbutus trees, orca’s, the farmer’s market, Wood Fire Pizza, landmarks known only to the locals, the magic mile, blackberries, the lighthouse, the old cottage, the galleries, spot prawns, sockeye salmon…and always the people.

The place that my family has grown to love best and it is where we return to celebrate and to grieve and to be together. It includes meaningful conversations, delicious meals, tears and laughter – the whole catastrophe of living. As two of my grandchildren recently said, “it feels like hope.” Swimming before dinner, walking to the point to see the sunset, drinking coffee in the early morning as the sun comes up, being mindful of the water shortage, knowing the power will go out, waiting for a ferry. It all matters. The effort to make that trip is always rewarded.

May you return now and then to your special places, while you can. Magic can happen there.

 

Notes

Note 1:) A note of gratitude for the beauty of the surroundings and the people with whom I was fortunate enough to  be with in  Vancouver and the islands.

Note 2:) Blackberries were picked by grandson Michael and friend Jim. The latter turned them into the best pies imaginable. All photos are on Gabriola.

Note 3:) Tomorrow is the first day of school in Ottawa. My personal hope is that it continues uninterrupted for the year.

Note 4:) As I contemplate my upcoming 75th birthday, I am in wonderment each morning that I get another day to enjoy this world even with all of its sorrows. Just like sunsets, each day is brand new and not to be taken for granted. 

Note 5:) With heartfelt thanks to all of you for your interest in my scribble’s. You make my life richer and more joyful, with your good company. Warmest wishes, Trudy

The Secret Art of Travel

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My title comes from Hermann Hesse’s “The Secret Art of Travel”:

To the eyes only looking hurriedly to the goal,

The sweetness of roaming cannot be savored.

Forests and streams and all of the magnificent

spectacles waiting along the way

Remain closed off.

I have things to say about my recent journey out west but this week I will set it up with this excerpt from my favourite little book by Shundo Aoyama, titled, Zen Seeds.

“The secret of traveling lies in savoring the things along the way. If you are in a hurry to reach your goal, you miss seeing the forests and the streams…unblemished twinkling of the stars. I savored Hesse’s poem anew and thought to myself that it was just the same with life. Enjoying each step of the way means making it (the journey) a destination in itself…in life, we never know what is going to happen. Last year on this mountain peak, local high school students were in serious danger when they were caught in a thunderstorm. sometimes people fall ill while climbing. If you have a goal like (arriving at) Myojin Pond and strain yourself to reach it, has your whole effort been wasted if you fall by the wayside?

No.

If we savor each step toward our destination as an experience never to be repeated, then we will have learned a way of walking in which any stopping place is good.”

Notes

Note 1:) I was fortunate this evening. I realized that I could not do the blog post I wanted to do and picked up the little book Zen Seeds, opened it to this excerpt, and said Ah! This will do.

Note 2:) My 12 days on the west coast were pretty much perfect, with the exception that I was not able to see some wonderful people in my life. 

Note 3:) The banner photo is the Harbour Air float plane that took me from Vancouver Island to the city of Vancouver. I love water transportation. Float planes, ferries, water taxis, boats of all kinds.

Note 3:) The beautiful labyrinth is on a friends’ property, with a Japanese studio close by. The story will be told later. With thanks to J & S.

Note 4:) Treasure the journey. I am not convinced that there is the “best” time to do things.  It might be best to do things when you can.

Note 5:) Today is September 1st. My favourite month. It just might have something to do with my birthday month.  Happy birthday to all of my September readers. It is rare for my blog to fall on the 1st of any month, so I will take advantage of it. A very special shout out to BI today.

Note 6:) I want to acknowledge that this is not a joy-filled day for everyone. This is the first anniversary for a dear friends loss of her precious daughter. We have tremendous suffering in life and we can’t do it alone. That’s why we all need each other. To help and to be helped.

Note 7:) A deep bow of thanks to you all, dear readers. With gratitude, Trudy

Unexpected Stillness

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Early Morning

I greeted the day at 5:00 AM, on the westcoast. Not a sound. I check my phone and notice it’s no longer charging. Across the room I see no light in the bathroom. Was it on an automatic timer? I am confused. As I stumble across the room for a light switch, I realize nothing is working. There is no power. How could this possibly be since there is no wind or storm? Nothing even brewing.

How can I now do the work I had planned to do? Thoughts race around.

In the meantime my feet wander towards the door and I step out onto the deck, to be greeted by the exquisite beauty of pre-dawn light, across Georgia strait. If that weren’t enough I have the coastal mountains for a backdrop. What could I do now except sit down and bask in the emerging show from Nature’s theatre.

For two hours and a bit I watched, with the stillness broken only by the unique cry of the eagles and the flutter of hummingbird wings. No hum from the fridge through the screen door. No ding on my phone. All was still.

The Light Changes

As the light changed I noticed the glow on the trees and even caught a glimpse of the parade of raccoons coming up from the beach. As I strolled around the property I was greeted with golden glows falling on a pot of hydrangeas, or a barely noticed corner of the garden. I nodded at the stone Buddhas and waved at the prayer flags waving at me, up beside the Labyrinth.

Back to the front deck to watch the sun come up and paint a path of golden sunlight across the water.

Nothing got done that I had planned. Yet the unplanned stillness and beauty of this morning enfolded me like a cape of the smoothest silk. An unexpected gift of the most priceless kind. Time. Beauty. Nature.

Why does it require a power outage for me to enjoy this gift? Must every hour be filled with what needs doing? Or can I/we simply take the time to bask in the summer’s morning light and be still for awhile.

 

How It Might Continue by Rosemerry Wahtola Trommer

Wherever we go, the chance for joy,
whole orchards of amazement—

one more reason to always travel
with our pockets full of exclamation marks,

so we might scatter them for others
like apple seeds.

Some will dry out, some will blow away,
but some will take root

and grow exuberant groves
filled with long thin fruits

that resemble one hand clapping—
so much enthusiasm as they flutter back and forth

that although nothing’s heard
and though nothing’s really changed,

people everywhere for years to come
will swear that the world

is ripe with applause, will fill
their own pockets with new seeds to scatter.

From Naked for Tea (Able Muse Press, 2018) as read on Gratefulness.org

As we come closer and closer to the end of August I hope you too have a few mornings of stillness and beauty. Consider making time for timelessness. See what happens. I will purposefully try it again tomorrow.

Notes

Note 1:) I hope you revel in these last days of August and get to be outdoors with nature’s healer. This afternoon I carried on and went for a forest walk through a trail of 150 year old cedars.

Note 2:) You may be interested in a first or second listen to Pico Iyer’s Ted Talk, on The Art of Stillness.

Note 3:) The photos are from beautiful Gabriola Island, BC.

Note 4:) Thank you for showing up once again to read my blog post. It is always an honour and a joy for me. Warmest wishes and see you next week, Trudy

 

Early Morning Rides and Walks

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Since my return from the Maritimes I have continued getting outdoors earlier in the morning. For those of you who haven’t tried this, you are in for a treat. The quality of the air,  the light, the lack of noise and the stunning beauty of all the flowers. It’s true that the environment matters. Yet in Canada and elsewhere,  for all of our complaints, we have a plethora of parks and green space in our cities. Free for our enjoyment.

Right now, I seem to stop a hundred times on a walk or a bike ride because of one more beautiful blossom or the way the sun lights up a tree trunk. Yesterday, or was it Monday, I was gobsmacked when I came upon this scene. In my ten years in Ottawa, with an eye always peeled for the great blue heron, I have not witnessed this particular posture. It was a wondrous moment.

 

“Waiting is not mere empty hoping; it is an inner certainty – The I Ching

It felt like a privilege to be part of this moment.  Even though I always wish I had my camera with me, I never do when I am biking, and, still, my iphone does a good enough job. As I live longer I am convinced that the beauty of the natural world is our treasure trove for what ails us. It offers inspiration, solace, wonder, beauty, comfort, reliability, rest and peace. And the science is illuminating what we already know.

A Study

In a study of 20,000 people, a team led by Mathew White of the European Centre for Environment & Human Health at the University of Exeter, found that people who spent two hours a week in green spaces — local parks or other natural environments, either all at once or spaced over several visits — were substantially more likely to report good health and psychological well-being than those who don’t. Two hours was a hard boundary: The study, published last June, showed there were no benefits for people who didn’t meet that threshold.

The effects were robust, cutting across different occupations, ethnic groups, people from rich and poor areas, and people with chronic illnesses and disabilities.

“It’s well-known that getting outdoors in nature can be good for people’s health and well-being, but until now we’ve not been able to say how much is enough,” White said. “Two hours a week is hopefully a realistic target for many people, especially given that it can be spread over an entire week to get the benefit.”

The study by White and his colleagues is only the latest in a rapidly expanding area of research that finds nature has robust effects on people’s health — physically, mentally, and emotionally. Excerpt from an article published at The Yale School of the Environment

This summer I have been more determined than ever to take advantage of this beautiful time. Partially due to Covid, and partially due to turning 75 and realizing that the number of summers I have left are in decline. The burgeoning science on the benefits of nature is robust, but the science isn’t necessary to convince me of the benefits. I experience it in my mind/body/spirit. As for the two hours, it is a guideline. I suggest as much time as possible. Like when I was a kid and summer meant being outside all day long.

We can’t all be outside all day anymore, but we can get out everyday.

Take this morning. Weather didn’t look good but my friend and I went for a 50 minute bike ride. No rain came down but it was hot and humid even at 8:00 and it was misty. “A soft day” the Irish might say. The English would probably say it was “good for our complexion.” I would just say that it was delightful. Not many people around, incredibly beautiful and breathtaking flower beds planted by the National Capital Commission. Wooden Japanese style bridges to ride over, mostly flat and curvy pathways, a few small hills, and bird song. These morning adventures get my day off to the best possible start. Better than any cup of coffee and I never miss a good strong, black coffee. I also never want to miss another early morning in summer.

Notes

Note 1:) A favourite essay by Neurologist  Oliver Sacks who writes with wisdom and poetic flair. “I cannot say exactly how nature exerts its calming and organizing effects on our brains, but I have seen in my patients the restorative and healing powers of nature and gardens, even for those who are deeply disabled neurologically. In many cases, gardens and nature are more powerful than any medication.” Dr. Oliver Sacks

Note 2:) Note the golden bee in the banner photo. I took this on a walk with my cousin in Hampton, NB. If you click on it you can see the intricacies of the bee and also what looks like a newborn baby bee to the left of him. I only noticed it when I posted the photo today. Here is one stanza from a  poem by Antonio Machado that I am grateful for:

Last night as I was sleeping,
I dreamt—marvelous error!—
that I had a beehive
here inside my heart.
And the golden bees
were making white combs
and sweet honey
from my old failures.

Note 3:) I realize that I must sound like a broken record this summer. The truth is many people are suffering. Taking time/making time to spend time in nature is life giving. Look around. Take it in. Rest your eyes. Take heart. Consider making it a practice like yoga or meditation or going to the gym. Try it and see what happens. Let me know, OK.

Note 4:) I have received several messages this week telling me how this blog is helpful to them or someone they know. Thank you for letting me know. That’s what I was hoping for in a very ordinary way. I appreciate everyone of you who takes the time to read what I write. It is my privilege and my joy to do so. Warmest August wishes, Trudy

A Million Things are Going Well…

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How are things?

This morning I wrote to a friend in answer to this query by writing “a million things are going well and a few things have been disconcerting.” Is that not the case with many of us?

Yesterday I was on the road again after a wonderful two week holiday in the Maritimes. So many wonderful things went well from safe travels, time with my wonderful relatives, good things to eat and drink, laughter, love and the beauty of nature.

The Unexpected

And the unexpected can happen. It is not unusual that we can ignore certain difficulties in life (you are free to insert yours) until they become personal. But when they do, they loom large and are layered with emotion. At those times we may notice how our minds tend to create one scenario after another, each worse than the one before.
And yet, if we stop for a few moments and assess the facts as they are, we can see that our brain machine has gone off the rails and is stuck in the groove of worst case scenario. Still, it is important to look ahead, especially if there is some preventative measures we can take. If  we get stuck in the catastrophe groove we may forget to focus on “facts as facts” or even overlook what we can and need to do.

Experience

At times like this I try to remember to look back. What actually happened when the sky fell for me? In the end did things work out? Was there something I learned? Is there a takeaway to do something different the next time?
Every action or non action we take in life has consequences and ripple effects. We can’t move or speak without leaving a trail. Some of those ripples are heartbreaking. Some are mind blowing. Some are brilliant. Some are life changing. Many are selfless. Some ripple with regret and remorse. This is how life is for humans.
However, once we take action, each one is written in stone. We can’t change the past. Yet, we can change the future by what we do today. We are learning machines and we ourselves can learn from our own mistakes. And the next time something similar happens, we can do something different. Going forward we can do what we can to remedy a situation and than use our precious lives to reconsider what we will do differently, the next time, under similar circumstances.
Life is not linear, from my experience. Things come and go. As Pema Chodron says, “they come together and they fall apart. Then they come together again and fall apart again. It’s just like that. The healing comes from letting their be room for all of this to happen: room for grief, for relief, for misery for joy.”
Take heart! As long as we are still breathing we have the chance to influence our ripples.

Notes

Note 1:) Here is the sound of the Atlantic ocean from Duck Pond Beach in New Brunswick.

Note 2:) A wonderful poem, thanks to Janice Falls that I found on my favourite poetry site Heart Poems

 

 

 

Safety Net

This morning I woke
thinking of all the people I love
and all the people they love
and how big the net
of lovers.
It felt so clear,
all those invisible ties
interwoven like silken threads
strong enough to make a mesh
that for thousands of years
has been woven and rewoven
to catch us all.
Sometimes we go on
as if we forget
about it. Believing only
in the fall. But the net
is just as real.
Every day,
with every small kindness,
with every generous act,
we strengthen it.
Notice,
even now, how
as the whole world
seems to be falling, it
is there for us as we
walk the day’s tightrope,
how every tie matters.
– Rosemary Wahtola Trommer
Note 3:) The photos are from Nova Scotia and New Brunswick
Note 4:) Yesterday was my travelling home day and we arrived safely back in Ottawa. Thank you for continuing to kindly read my blog. I feel very lucky to have such wonderful readers. No more travelling on Wednesdays. See you next week. With appreciation and warmest wishes, Trudy

Something to Think About

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Travelling Day

Today is another travelling day as I move on to Nova Scotia, to visit, in particular, my 97 year old amazing Aunt Ruth. I will find her at her cottage on Brule Beach, most likely riding her golf cart to the nearby bakery for her supper. Feisty, kind, smart and full of life she lives independently and without complaint. Furthurmore, if any of you dropped by and told her you knew me, you would be invited in for a cup of tea. Warning – be prepared to have your ear talked off and to fall in love. If I am lucky, a few of my cousins who have cottages nearby may also be around. Lucky me.

Since there is no WiFi at Aunt Ruth’s cottage I am writing a short post before I leave, so I can send it from my phone, in the morning.

Wake up Grateful

Coincidentally, I am reading a book called Wake Up Grateful, by Kristi Nelson. Kristi is the executive director of the Network for Grateful Living and has her masters in public administration from Harvard. she is also a Stage IV cancer survivor and near the end of her book she writes these words.

“Surviving cancer taught me to notice all that is available here and now, to see beyond the myth that more is better, and to make a practice of not taking life and love for granted. The harbinger of joy is to focus on noticing, appreciating, sharing more of what is already given and present. Absent that capacity for appreciating what is, more of anything ultimately ends up neglected or as landfill. It was clear to me: life is meant to be savoured, for as long as we are able, as often as we are able, in relationship to as many experiences as we are able…life is a gift. Everything is a surprise. The ordinary is extraordinary…it is never too late…say yes to life.

Notes

Note: 1) Now I will soon be off. Thank you for tagging along  on my summer holiday. I appreciate your company. I hope you too are having some magical moments this month: moonlight, stars, fireflies, sunflowers, gatherings with loved ones, forest walks, swims, kayaking, laughter and love. Don’t miss these days.  Warmest wishes, Trudy

PS Even when things are going wrong there is always something to be grateful for. Kristi writes something like – gratefulness doesn’t protect us from the vicissitudes of life but it really helps us to navigate them.

 

A Song of Praise to White and Yellow Lines

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If I were a poet I would compose an ode to the road but since I’m not I will make a list instead. Why? Because it is thanks to those white and yellow lines on the highways that I got to drive safely for 1112 km yesterday. I landed in the small and charming town of Hampton New Brunswick, where I was welcomed by my  wonderful cousins.  During the last 18 km, which seemed to be the longest, I thought about what it took for me to be able to do this:

My List

  • Those white and yellow lines, for sure.
  • The actual people who did the work.
  • The thousands of drivers I followed, passed and met, who stayed on their side of that line.
  • Signage
  • Google maps
  • Divided highways
  • Construction crews improving and also building better roads, while working in the hot sun and dust.
  • Pull off rest stops for food, water and gas and a place to stretch my legs.
  • My Toyota, which has reliably traveled 116,000 km with me.

Perks of the trip:

  • Ground mist, on the fields, early in the morning between Ottawa and Montreal.
  • Magnificent green fields, rolling hills, and stunningly beautiful skies in NB.
  • The ease and speed of correcting a missed exit.
  • The company of my son in law in the morning who was the morning driver and a great conversationalist.
  • The podcast we listened to by Lisa Damour on her book Untangled. About the seven transitions of teenage girls into adulthood. This description does not do justice to the depth, breath, science and heart of this matter.
  • The company of my daughter/passenger for the afternoon. Road trips are great places for talking.
  • Improved directions, over google, from my cousin Shannon just in the nick of time.
  • Arriving at last light – not complete darkness.
  • The warm welcome of love, food and a glass of chilled white wine from Sonya.
  • A warm cozy bed in a beautiful room, complete with hot water bottle for my feet when she noticed my hands were cold from fatigue.
  • Memories of my mother.

My Mother

A year ago on July 26th my 100 year old Mother died. And her love of the maritime provinces and all her nieces and nephews who live  here is well known. As I entered New Brunswick I noticed the landscape through her eyes and could imagine her commentary as we drove along.

Last year during her last two weeks several of these cousins longed to be with her but could not due to Covid. So it is particularly poignant for me to arrive here on her 1st anniversary.There will be many Mom stories during this time.

This is the thing. When we die, we leave people behind who love and remember us. And we remember them best through the stories we tell. I see shades of my Mother in all of her relations and I treasure them all.

While I am here I will have a lobster roll, a cone of grape-nut ice cream, wild blueberries, strawberry shortcake and with each bite I/we will remember her love of family and summertime.

What are some fun and ordinary everyday things that you do, in the summer, which remind you of your loved ones who are no longer with you? I would love to hear about them.

Stay safe and enjoy this end of July/beginning of August weekend.

NOTES

Note 1:) Here is the poem I like to dedicate to my Mother. Her photo was taken a few days before she died.

The Gift of a Smiling Face

With just your being there,

The atmosphere somehow brightens.

With just your being there,

Everyone feels at ease.

I yearn to be just like you.

This is my favorite poem by calligrapher Mitsu Aida.

Note 2:) The banner photo was taken in New Brunswick a few summers ago in a garden of beauty.

Note 3:) The walking group photo  is of a crazy family paying no attention to the yellow line whatsoever. This was taken in Ottawa, three years ago, during race weekend when my 98 year old Mother flew in from Vancouver Island and we (cousins and all)walked the 5 KM together. 

Note 4:) Thank you for coming by here. I love these virtual visits with all of you who take time to read my blog. You make my life better. Warmest wishes, Trudy

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“We are born and we die…” John Tarrant

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An excerpt from the poem

In Blackwater Woods

by Mary Oliver

To live in this world

you must be able
to do three things:
to love what is mortal;
to hold it

against your bones knowing
your own life depends on it;
and, when the time comes to let it go,
to let it go.

Today

Today death came to the husband of a reader of this blog. It came suddenly but not unexpectedly. There is sadness, yet, there is gratitude to see the end of suffering. Furthurmore, we know so little about the end of life. But those who remain grieve and cry and will  live with sadness for awhile. “Awhile,” is different for each of us.

It has been my experience that story telling, about our loved ones who die, is one of the loveliest things we can do for each other. And we don’t need to only tell the great things. It seems to me that there is great humanity, joy, love, laughter and truth in being able to talk about foibles, quirks, eccentricities…the whole gamut of what makes each of us unique. We can even tell stories through memorabilia. What were the things our loved one collected, would waste money on, treasured. Hearing stories through the lens of others can warm and soften our hearts as we all know too well that no one is perfect. (well, maybe my Mother) :-))

There is no way to avoid death, and the longer we live the more often we will face death. This is hard.

I extend words of solace and comfort to all of you who are grieving the loss of a loved one. When the time comes, life will be there to  gently move you forward. Don’t you think we are all life’s helpers…  we are in this together and are here to help and to be helped.

Always know you can reach out if you need a hand. If you like, you are always welcome to write to me and tell me a favourite story of your loved one. I would be honoured to hear it.

Some of you know by now that I love this little poem by Rumi. He speaks words of comfort to me, and I hope he does for you too.

Meaningful Memories JapanThe Window by Rumi

Your body is away from me
but there is a window open
from my heart to yours.

From this window, like the moon
I keep sending news secretly.

Notes

Note 1:) Knowing we will not live forever can help us treasure the precious moments we have.

Note 2:) We all have regrets because we are humans not robots. There is no need, however, for our regrets to hold us back.

Note 3:) The banner photo was taken in Hawaii by Gottfried, who has kindly donated a library of photos for my use, and the one of the water and cosmos, I took in Japan, while on a five day walking trip.

Note 4:) I am grateful for your confidence in me. Showing up; reaching out; staying in touch. Thank you. My heart is with you and I extend warmest wishes to each of you. Trudy

 

 

 

 

A Hot and Humid Summer Night – Life is Good

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This evening it is exceptionally hot in my study. So I see it as an opportune time to share a poem, an excerpt and a short video. The poem is a favourite of mine and I put a link to its online home.

The poem

 

Any Morning

Just lying on the couch and being happy.
Only humming a little, the quiet sound in the head.
Trouble is busy elsewhere at the moment, it has
so much to do in the world.

People who might judge are mostly asleep; they can’t
monitor you all the time, and sometimes they forget.
When dawn flows over the hedge you can
get up and act busy.

Little corners like this, pieces of Heaven
left lying around, can be picked up and saved.
People won’t even see that you have them,
they are so light and easy to hide.

Later in the day you can act like the others.
You can shake your head. You can frown.

By William Stafford

 

Perfectly OK

“When we plant a rose seed in the earth, we notice that it is small, but we do not criticize it as “rootless and stemless.” We treat it as a seed, giving it the water and nourishment required of a seed. When it first shoots up out of the earth, we don’t condemn it as immature and underdeveloped; nor do we criticize the buds for not being open when they appear. We stand in wonder at the process taking place and give the plant the care it needs at each stage of its development. The rose is a rose from the time it is a seed to the time it dies. Within it, at all times, it contains its whole potential. It seems to be constantly in the process of change; yet at each state, at each moment, it is perfectly all right as it is.”  W. Timothy Gallwey – The Inner Game of Tennis

I discovered this on James Clear’s (author of Atomic Habits) weekly newsletter.

A new discovery this week is Dr. Edith Eger

An amazing woman in her mid 90’s who still works, writes, and gives numerous interviews and keynotes around the world.

“I don’t want you to hear my story and say, “My own suffering is less significant.” I want you to hear my story and say, “If she can do it, then so can I!”
― Edith Eger, The Choice: Embrace the Possible

The Video

Finally, a short joyful video with Desmond Tutu wishing the Dalai Lama birthday greetings last week on his 86th Birthday. When I see these two together I am beaming from ear to ear with joy. I just can’t contain myself. Their affection is self-evident. Recently, a new movie was made about their friendship called  Mission: Joy – Finding Happiness in Troubled Times. At this point I have not been able to find a way to stream or rent it in Canada. Please send me a note if you spot its availability.

Notes

Note 1: You will notice a new link to my book on the right hand side. I created a page with the help of my amazing webmaster, Margaret Rode. Also, on that same page is a link to the podcast where I was recently interviewed. (for those who are interested)

Note 2:) I took these two flower photos in two different yards, in the next block to where I live. How lucky am I to stroll around in the midst of  such blooms. 

Note 3: Thank you for all your warm notes and comments. I wish you a lovely July week and thank you so much for continuing to show up here. Warmest wishes to you all, Trudy

PS I just discovered that if you read this on your phone you don’t see the right hand margin where the link to my book lives. In the meantime, here is the link.

 

Copyright ©2018 Trudy Boyle and Living Well with Illness. All rights reserved.