Small Things Matter – Worry is Natural

Let’s Face It

There is nothing normal about these times.  I looked back and I have written about this topic before but somehow things seem even more bleak now. Recent world events do not leave us much wiggle room for optimism. Every day, terrible things affect us from one continent to the next.  And it isn’t only weapons of mass destruction, but it includes politics,  climate change, financial uncertainty, health, jobs, and fear of what the future may hold for our children and grandchildren. The erosion of trust and confidence in our institutions and elected officials is exacerbated by fake news and the influence of commercial influencers. The world we took for granted seems to be falling apart. No wonder so many people are sleepless, anxious and not knowing what to do.

Rilke describes it well – “as if standing on fishes as if the ground had a life of its own and were swimming away underneath (us).”

This sounds pretty dire coming from me; I know that. And it isn’t exactly what I mean, either. I am a realistic optimist, a facts as facts person, and because of that I am not an everything will turn out ok kind of person. Furthurmore, as the news worsens, I am discouraged, especially because I know people impacted by all this awfulness. I find it challenging to write my blog post for fear that anything I say will be trite. Nevertheless, my default is to start where I am, right where I am sitting, unsure.

First Anxiety and Worry are natural.

How could we not be anxious and worried? There are things to be concerned about. We  can’t turn our anxiety and worry off, like a light switch. Our brains are designed to focus on problem-solving and find ways to overcome the problems. We want to reassure ourselves about the future and do what we can to have a good one – not just world order, but our health and family concerns.

Uncontrollable Future

Our desire to control the uncontrollable future fuels much of our worry. We want certainty and guarantees. And sadly these are not available to us.

Having said all this, it is important to acknowledge our common humanity. We are not unique in our world of worry and wanting security. This is the human condition. And, a big, important AND—most people in our daily lives are good people, just like you.

This takes me straight back to where I always land. We can’t count on tomorrow; life is the “full catastrophe,” and our best bet is to do what we can, where we are, to cheer each other on. Be a little kinder,  lend a hand and never forget to do what we can do. Laugh often and love much as my friend says. Spend time in nature to rejuvenate and notice the gifts all around us. Today and every day is a precious and special day. Let’s make the best of it.

Furthurmore

• Consider reading books or longer articles rather than breaking news and clickbait.
• If you want to read the news, pick a time of day, and do it once – not in the evening.
• Take up that hobby you have neglected—make things, make marks with paints and drawing instruments, put together a new botanical Lego set, or become a bird watcher.
• Get together with people you like once a week to share food and a glass of wine or ginger ale.
• Look at small things you can do in your community—acts of service, calls, and letters.
• Stay informed, but don’t drown. Walking in nature and watching for the first signs of spring help build resilience and strength.
• Always remember what matters most and attend to that everyday.
• Take heart! Do things that lift your spirits.

Notes

1:)”This world is full of conflicts and full of things that cannot be reconciled. But there are moments when we can… reconcile and embrace the whole mess, and that’s what I mean by ‘Hallelujah.” Leonard Cohen

2:) “There is no time other than now. We are not, contrary to what we think, “going” anywhere. It will never be more rich in some other moment than in this one. Although we may imagine that some future moment will be more pleasant, or less, than this one, we can’t really know. But whatever the future brings, it will not be what you expect, or what you think, and when it comes, it will be NOW too. It too will be a moment that can be very easily missed, just as easily missed as this one.” From Arriving at your own Door: 108 Lessons in Mindfulness. Jon Kabat Zinn

3:) “Despair demands less of us, it’s more predictable, and in a sad way safer. Authentic hope requires clarity – seeing the troubles in this world – and imagination, seeing what might lie beyond these situations that are perhaps not inevitable and immutable.”— Rebecca Solnit

4:)  “Today I bent the truth to be kind, and I have no regret, for I am more sure of what is kind than I am of what is true.” Robert Brault

5:) “Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does.” – William James

6:) And for a tender look at a 74 year old albatross thanks to the Smithsonian and son Rob. Scroll down a couple of paragraphs to see the video.

PS Thanks for the signs for spring, Rob. Love that duck too.

PPS I will be doing something different on my blog next week. I don’t know what yet but I hope it will be something we like.